About a year ago, my dad grew THE gay mustache. You know the kind. Full, bushy (no pun intended) without any hint of the upper lip showing. I didn't say anything. I just figured that he was 70 now and didn't give a fuck what anybody thought anymore.
So when we walked out of Charming Charlies one day(a teeny bopper and gay guys accessory paradise) he made a comment about how the gay guys that work there really love to talk to him. Every time my mom drags him to that store, he gets hit on. Of course my dad, always interested in being PC, just laughs and flirts right back.
I explained to him on the way home that he was being hit on because he has a gay mustache. He seems confounded. "What is a gay mustache?" I told him all about gay guy look, especially the older sect, and their full bushy mustache. It's very vogue in the gay culture, I explained. Everybody knows that. He couldn't believe it. All this time he was walking around no doubt thinking that he was a Magnum PI bad ass, when really he was magnet for gays.
My mom did call me a few days later. He had shaved it off. Apparently, he's not THAT gay after all.